Thursday, December 27, 2012

If I have the guts, I really want to write a long story about it. A very long like an explanation plus expository writing skills. But I do have this I-should-keep-this-just-for-myself attitude and really that make me as mysterious and unexpected girl.

27th really have a close relationship with me for a while. Keep counting and waiting. All the gloomy day and all the happy moment was related to 27th. It been a while and sometime I even forgot that 27th is around the corner or the date is finally there. And yeah, sometime I felt a good achievement if I am not feel too attach with 27th anymore. Just somehow wanna buried everything deep down somewhere. But that is still an impossible mission.

I just want to break the shell and come out from it.

To someone,
Happy 2 years of friendship. I wish you were here.

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Do you ever try to ignore some question just because you:
1. Don't want to think about it.
2. Don't want to explain about it
3. Don't have answer for it.
4. Don't know what the best answer you can give.

Yes. I bet most of all always be in that kind of situation. Somehow I don't like it. Especially if it related to privacy thing. I never really talk about my private life openly. So, some situation just make me feel uncomfortable. Giving uncertain answer just will make people try to dig more and more. It just I wish I don't need to talk about personal thing. Well, I am not an anti social type. I do like have fun with friends and do some crazy stuff. But still every people have this level where they call as "comfort zone" that you can't easily break in and steal every thing. And I think I have this big wall of comfort zone which only me know what happen and what actually I am doing or understand why I did this or that. But I do have friends that I can count on to give me hint and sign about what to do without they realizing it. Just, I know that I have stubborn heart.

It hard to give answer when you still not sure about it. It even getting harder when you actually try not to think about it.

Yue 2012

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Silent Killer

Being a part of memories sometimes really a great killer. Not because you already forget about it. It just because the person who sharing the memories seem to throw it away. Make you heart shattered apart just because suddenly you become less important and maybe nothing anymore. You may take it as positive as you can. But somehow, human heart is not as strong as that. A fragile heart. Even it try to stay away from the pain of believing everything already changed and it will not be the same anymore. Just the breath make sure it still alive pumping the blood. But why it feel itchy?

Throw everything and be a new person is not as easy as we can say or we plan. It took a lot of times and courage. It also take away a lot of tears and give the pain. Only time will tell when the exact time we will heal. But still, being sorrow for 25 hours is insane.

Sometime the pain is giving you trauma and somehow starting all over again is just like a nightmare that you want to avoid - yue

Thursday, November 1, 2012

1 November 2012. Finally, 1 month before another new year come. Is it alright for me to sum up every thing right now? Well, maybe it still too early for that. Many thing can happen even just in a day. So, I still have another more than 30 day to come up with any unexpected thing or the expected one?

2012 surely be one of memorable year for me. Too many things happen and I can't even speak up every detail here. I just hope one day if I read whatever I type now 10 or 20 years later, I still be able to remember what exactly I am talking about. I do hope I still can remember every detail of every story that ever happen in 2012. Hope will make us alive and I think there is nothing wrong with keep hoping.

November, it surely not feel the same as last year or another year. It will bring a lot of thing that I will treasure. Final year as a student here and also final year to feel the school holiday as a student. I surely will miss this and hopefully I will be able to feel the excitement even when I already have job later. So, I will feel forever young and we should be forever young right? So we can always keep moving on and not stuck in a destination only.

Dear memories, don't keep remain silent. Just come back whenever you think I need you. When I feel alone or when I feel down. Just feel free to come because somehow I think I need you at that moment. So, please stay alive even the times passing by. - yue 1 November 2012

Saturday, October 27, 2012

27 October 2012, Saturday.

Because it was real and it not just a dream that you can forget every time you are awake. - yue



This lie's become a part of me 
For months, I've played this game
Acting like it doesn't hurt
Each time I hear his name
Ignoring what's inside of me
Pretending I've moved on
As if the feelings I once had 
For him are somehow gone

Spending each and every day
With happiness and laughs
Forgetting all our memories
Avoiding photographs

But last night when I saw him
For the first time since he left
My heart stopped for a moment
I couldn't catch my breath

When suddenly it hit me
As the tears started to flow
That even after all this time
I just can't let him go

"Love will live. Love will last. Love goes on and on and on." – Robin Hood

Friday, October 26, 2012

Masih menyambut Aidiladha tahun ini sebagai perantau. Mungkin tradisi ini akan diteruskan pada tahun-tahun akan datang. Menjadi perantau di kala Aidiladha menjengah.

Tahun ini, tahun terakhir menyambut Aidiladha bersama rakan-rakan memandangkan tahun depan bakal bergelar penganggur dan akan bertebaranlah kami di mana-mana pelusuk pun yang akan ditentukan kelak.

Kepada rakan-rakan yang terlibat konvoi ke rumah Amirul dan Hidayah. Thank you for the memory :)

Salam Aidiladha untuk semua.

Monday, October 22, 2012

fly to Japan

Let fly fly to Japan and meet Kamenashi Kazuya..!! Kyaaa..! Hontou ni tanoshikata. Since my laptop can't even type in other languages instead the roman, so I just use pronunciation.  So Yue, when will you master and improve your Japanese if you keep using that style only? milkysmile

wakaranai na. 

Actually that is not the main reason to type and post here XD 

I got headache + Flu + Sneezing milkysmile

I don't know if I can concentrate on my revision. Tomorrow gonna have KISSM exam and I just preparing myself less than 2 days. Need to read bunch of notes and lika-a-law book. Well, we can call that book as a law book. Hope I can stay up and read it all. Dear body + mind + heart, please be good to me milkysmile

Saturday, October 20, 2012

"I have forgiven mistakes that were almost unforgivable, I have tried to replace those who were not replaceable and tried to forget those who were unforgettable. I have done things on impulse. I have been let down by those whom I thought would never let me down but I have also let others down. I have laughed when it was almost impossible to laugh. I have held someone to protect them. I have made lifelong friends, I’ve loved and been loved. I have screamed and jumped for joy, I have lived on love and made eternal promises of love. I have fallen many times. I have cried while listening to music and also when looking at photos. I have called someone just to hear their voice. I have fallen in love with a smile. I have also thought I was going to die from loosing someone special and I did loose them! But I lived! And I still live! I don’t allow life to pass me by and neither should you! Live! What is really good is to fight with determination, embrace life and live it with passion! Loose your battles with class and dare to win because the world belongs to those who dare and life, life is worth too much to be insignificant."

 Augusto Brando

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Aku yang khilaf

Percaturan hidup. Bagaimana harus kita mendepani sebenarnya? Tiada jawapan pasti bagi merungkai penyelesaian bagi setiap persoalan. Tidak peduli atau membiarkan sahaja juga bukanlah satu jawapan yang sesuai. Di kala menelurusi laluan kehidupan, jatuh bangun dan tangis tawa rencah dalam mencari erti kata kematangan dalam kehidupan. Dan aku, dalam langkah kaki yang terkadang perlahan, laju dan sesekali berlari masih belum mampu untuk memberi erti pada langkah kaki itu. Kadang aku alpa, melakukan salah tanpa sedar dan kadang bagai terpaku sejenak membiarkan saja yang khilaf itu merajai diri. Namun syukur, masih diri diberi peluang untuk mengenal erti muhasabah diri. Perjalanan masih jauh. Mungkin destinasi yang belum pasti itu tidak terjangkau. Langkah masih bertatih. Walau kadang kala cuba untuk berlari. Mungkin sudah ketetapan Illahi, destinasi itu belum milikku lagi. Aku yang khilaf ini, cuba sedaya upaya dengan cangkiran kesedaran cuba untuk melangkah walau kadang kala tersungkur. Berdiri kembali setelah tersungkur rebah terasa nikmatnya. Menjadi antara insan yang diberi kesempatan untuk membetulkan khilaf diri, moga apa yang dihajati tercapai nanti. Langkah kaki ini kuharap menuju kebahagian yang hakiki berlandaskan lorong-lorong syurgawi.

Monday, October 1, 2012

Life is too short to worry about what others say or think about you. So have fun and give them something to talk about. ;)

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Normally, people try to forget those memories that bring pain and tears to them. But somehow, some memories just not mean to be forgotten. Some people just afraid if they forgot those memories or let it faded away, the feeling will gone too. At the end, we just need to admit that there always reasons for something to happen. We maybe will not find out it now, but as we know life is a big puzzle that will never can be solve.We will eventually find the conclusion. Still, we don't know where our decision will lead us. At the mean time, just enjoy life and try not to worry too much. As always been said :"Life is too short to waste for something worthless".

Dying to know, afraid to find out.

Oh, it 27th of September. I never thought I will forgot. 

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Wake up?

People have their own desire how to deal with thing. For me, sometime we just need to wake up and stand up. We don't know if we will have much time to enjoy every part of our life or when people beside us will be gone one day. It true that somebody will stay beside us no matter what will happen but for sure life is more challenging than that. What we can do is just be strong and believe in faith.

Monday, September 24, 2012

Some said the pain that still coming back is the pain that never go away. Is it true? So, what the point of referring to heal process? Is it just a word and will only stay and remain as a word? Life always guarantee you with a new challenge. That what keep you moving on and be strong day after day. Experience always come with a price. Strong doesn't mean you need to have a muscle body. It just the way you handle your mind and emotion in matured way indicate how strong you are. So to the people out there, don't let the emotion handle you.

It raining heavily outside. Good weather for a tight sleep. Good night fella ^^
heart keeper, be safe.

Finally, I am writing back here. Kind of awkward to start writing. Maybe I should say thank you to Jin Akanishi and Kuroki Meisa. Haven't heard from them since February after their marriage. By the way, just heard about Jin Akanishi and Kuroki Meisa happy news. Omedetou ne. Now, you become daddy already. Be good one ne bro. I hope akachan will be fine too.

I know Jin Akanishi for almost 5 years already if I not mistaken. He is very talented person yet have a big dream about his career. To see his achievement at LA, I am proud to be one of his fan. For Kuroki Meisa, I think  I start to know her when she act with Kamenashi Kazuya in One Pound No Fukuin drama.  Wish both of you happily ever after.  ^^

*hugs n kisses for baby v(^____^)v

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Thank you for the birthday wishes and birthday party. I can't say much. Just glad to have all of you as my friend. Hope our friendship will be forever :)

Monday, June 11, 2012

Bila mana ku mencari
Tak tergapai oleh tanganku
Jauh dari adanya aku

Kadang kau ada
Dan kadang kau tiada
Buat ku tercari
Tapi sendiri tertanya
Tak pasti apa sebenarnya

Dan bila kau ada dan tiada
Akan kubiarkan sahaja
Kala hati tertanya
Tidak mengerti

yue - 11 June 2012

Sunday, June 10, 2012

wake up and it raining
look outside the window
staring at the cloudy sky
I wonder if we see the same sky
is it also raining at your place now?
I wonder where are you heading to now
I can see you in your car
driving to the place that you use to go
it raining here
and if it the same at your place
will you be more careful while driving?
send my pray to you
take care and remember
you always in my thought

yue - 10 June 2012

Thursday, June 7, 2012


Cinta pertama mungkin tidak indah tapi paling sukar untuk dilupa :)

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

This evening, I go to a few shop around Pekan Membakut and plan to buy ice cream. But, I can't find any ice cream box that I want or should I say the one that I use to buy?.......! I wonder what happen to the ice cream factory. Puzzle -.- Finally..! I found one..! Even not the usual ice cream that we use to eat. But at least better than nothing right?   

Mat Kool Chocolate mix Vanilla flavour

 Look delicious. Well, the taste not really bad too :)
digging. digging. digging. la la la

Monday, June 4, 2012

There is a quote that stated : "Home is where your heart live". So, can I call you my home? (^-^*)

Heart keeper, there is so many thing that I want to share but seem thing not gonna be the same anymore. Keep safe and hope one day we will meet again.

 I’m always the one who loves more. That’s kinda my thing. :)

Saturday, June 2, 2012

I miss my blogger friends. Seem all of them not active in blogging anymore. Hey..!! Show up soon..! I miss you guys a lot. Well, me too not really into blogging for this past few years. Feel so awkward to active back. Plus, I dislike how some people use my chat box to advertise they thing that I don't even know what is it all about.

This semester break will be my last holiday as IPG student. Spend it with reading and reading and reading. To be honest, Yue is not really a good girl in planning what to do. I wish I can spend my holiday somewhere but it seem impossible. So, here I am, just updating my blog and continue reading :)

p/s: hope you are fine there

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Sometimes the people who don't talk to you are the ones that really want to.
 Because I don't have any plan what to do for my last mid semester break as a college student, I come up with an idea to make a mess in my own room. Look back in my box where I put all my old stuff there and I found my Diary..! Do you ever have a  diary too? I bet all of us have our own diary right? Diary is like a close friend that we have and who we search at the very end of the day. The one that we talk with and make a conclusion about what we been through for the whole day. Just, diary can't talk to us..! I wonder what it will say to me if it could. XD

Reading back those notes that I ever wrote at my teen, I wonder how matured I am now. Do I still be the same person who wrote those diary thing back then? The more I read, the more I miss that person. The person that I used to be. But still, I appreciate what the past me have done to the present me. Just, I felt a little bit embarrassing to read every thing back. #blushes "(  ´   ▽   `  )ノ"

Well, will read those diary for today. What for tomorrow? Still thinking v(^___^)v

Monday, May 28, 2012


Bila kita sayangkan seseorang, kita kena belajar percayakan dia - "Dibius Cinta" - Qash Irdina
 Bukan mudah tapi perlu :)

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

1 day to go

Can we just fast forward everything please? I am not ready. Physically and mentally. Both side still wandering out there somewhere. But somehow I just want everything to end soon. The end of Semester 7 for me in degree and that mean 1 Semester more before I graduate. Hope everything will going on well and smoothly. Now, let me focus to my final paper for this semester. Here's to the girls who keep a smile on even at their worst.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

 Kamenashi Kazuya.........! Will be in new movie..! Looking forward for it. Gambatte ne Kazuya..! 

This is what the drama will be about. It sound interesting. I bet I should get the copy of the novel first. Wish I can get one that already being translated..! If not, mean I need a dictionary. Well, wish me luck..! <3

Monday, May 21, 2012

In love circle, we should admit that not all will wishing you live happily ever after wish. Even in fairytale they will face many kind of obstacles before can live together and get the "happily ever after" for happy ending. You will hear and found many type of stories about love in this world. Not all will have a bed of roses story. But still, we should believe that every love that we create is worth at that moment.

We should believe that, every thing in this world come in pairs. If we not success to be with the one we love at this moment, maybe he or she is not the right pair. So, don't give up because somehow, someone out there also try to find the other pair of him or her.

We should admit that, even a person is officially yours, it doesn't mean that no one will try to take that person from your side. Fight for it if that person worth it and let go if you feel both of you not supposed to be together. Letting go is not easy. But still, that how love work and that how we will have the space and opportunity to find the right one. Life is complicated yet so enjoyable.

Don't buried  love in the dark, make it shine before it sinking and will never be seen again - yue

Sunday, May 20, 2012

face the truth

Life is so challenging. Well, if we don't face any obstacles in our life, it will be so colourless. Who will agree with me that all the obstacles make your life more alive and give you courage to move on and looking forward for whatever that will happen in your life? Thank you if you agree and if not, I love to hear your opinion. Maybe because people experience different thing in life, so it will be various of opinion depend on what life we have been through.

As far that I can say, I love what already happened in my life. Maybe it not really as exciting as other people life. But still I believe what already happened make a shape to my life now and what I be right now. If you don't like who am I now, blame on my past..! [just kidding]

We should always looking for the best for our future. Gloomy day today won't indicate it should be the same tomorrow. People do come and go in our life. Memories do grow. So, why should we stay and be sorrow? Bring it on..! Take the people who want to stay at your life to the future. Have fun and face the challenge. We don't know if we can do it or not until we take a step forward.

Happy Sunday.

Yue 2012 <3

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Yue is coming back.. la la la.. it already almost the end of May..! Where have I been? haha.. Well, maybe just not in mood to type and post anything here? Slowly my blog faded away from google search. Make it comeback..! XD

Exam..! One paper more to go and I hope I can do it well. Since I have no idea what should I read or what should I understand, I just read what I can. Do whatever I can to make me feel that I am ready to be at the exam hall. Good luck Yue.

For this past few months, feel like something is missing. I miss that missing pieces. Where should I find it? I wonder if I can put it together back so that missing pieces won't be missing pieces anymore. Well, life is complicated and we will hardly believe that we are strong enough to through every chapter. Maybe that missing pieces not a missing pieces. It just maybe we need another pieces that more fit to complete our puzzle. Then, I am looking forward for both :)

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

365 days

The fact that I am waiting for something impossible to happen is killing me slowly.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

I am fine

I feel much better :)

Monday, January 2, 2012

2nd January 2012, going back to college. Done with my unpacking. Tired. Watch movie the whole night. Hostel seem so quiet since holiday will be until 3rd January plus most of the senior of Semester 8 last year already done with their course here. This year is my turn. 5 years fly by very fast. Time to go to Dreamland. Hit the sack. Waiting for a new day tomorrow. Bye bye star.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

2012, please be good to me :)

2011 already be a quit good year for me. I got lot of memories that will be my treasure for the rest of my life. Even it ended with unexpected thing, I will be strong. So, 2012, please give me another shot of beautiful stories to tell one day :)

2011, I am gonna miss everything.